Twinsight 25 of 50: Remind Yourself of Labors of Love

Can you believe it's Labor Day weekend? The summer always feels like it goes too fast, but I'm honestly not sure where this one went. The Labor Day holiday was established to remember the rights and triumphs that workers in business and industry have gained over the last couple of centuries. We have certainly come a long way. My parents and grandparents were part of the generations who made such significant progress in American business, and maybe yours were as well. After I finished college and had been in the workplace for several years (and they had become SO much smarter!), I framed this quote for my parents:

A hundred times a day I remind myself that my inner and outer life

depend on the labors of other men [and women], living and dead, and that

I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure
as I have received and am still receiving.

- Albert Einstein

Gardar, ND, church and cemetery where my parents were laid to rest

I'm doing well if even once a day I remember that others have invested in my life, and that I, in turn, have the responsibility and privilege to give back to others in all avenues of my life. But today, as I reflect on the influence of my parents who have both passed away, I'd like to share a variation of some thoughts that I posted on my mom's CaringBridge site last year.

• My parents' influence has shaped so much of who I am. I knew that fact intellectually, but now it's more clear to me how they shaped me in so many ways that affect me every day, even after they're no longer on earth. In certain poignant moments of life - like dropping Leah off at college last week and remembering watching mom and dad silently walk to the car after we said goodbye on my first day of college - I even sense their presence with me now. We certainly weren't a perfect family. But despite our flaws and quirks, there was an implicit unconditional love and grace that permeated our home, something we actively seek to build in our home now.
• The memories become sweeter and crisper. I have countless memories that are more endearing and clearer in my mind now - like finding the gifts that mom had creatively scattered around the house on Christmas morning, sitting with my dad in his chair and reading newspapers together (he subscribed to 11 at one point), and watching him completely embrace and love our girls after he had been hesitant about adoption. Steve misses mom's ironing. She loved to iron and it was always on her job list when she came to our house. She even ironed his underwear. Wow, we miss that service although Steve can bend over with more ease now that his shorts aren't starched.
• God is a God of healing. Now when I have a ping of sadness about them - usually triggered by little things like hearing Rhapsody in Blue (one of my dad's favorite songs) or watching a teenage boy put his bare feet on a coffee table (something mom was famous for) - a little smile comes to my face...not so much tears anymore. Time does heal. But it's not as much about time as about how God is working. It seems that through people and circumstances, God just shows up when I need Him most and He assures me that He is with me through thick and thin and that won't ever change (Deuteronomy 31:6).
• Life marches on. While it's important to savor the memories, it's important to move on and live life to the fullest. Mom and dad wouldn't want it any other way. One of the pastors of our church, Joel, lent me a book called A Grace Disguised by Jerry Sittser who suffered a catastrophic loss. Sittser writes, "...the experience of loss itself does not have to be the defining moment of our lives. Instead, the defining moment can be our response to the loss. It is not what happens to us that matters as much as what happens in us." Fredrick Buechner writes, "Even the saddest things can become, once we have made peace with them, a source of wisdom and strength for the journey that still lies ahead."

If photos had names like paintings, I'd name this one "Lighten Up!"

Who has labored in love on your behalf? May today we remind ourselves of those labors and resolve to do the same for others.

To follow this blog, click "follow" in the blue bar at the top, or key your email address into the long white space and click "submit."